Our specialty
Neurodiversity and disability‑affirming dating support
Matchmaking and dating coaching for neurodivergent and disabled adults, including autistic adults and adults with intellectual and developmental disabilities (IDD), and the families who support them.
There is no single neurodivergent dating experience.
We have extensive experience matching and coaching neurodivergent adults, specifically autistic adults and adults with intellectual and developmental disabilities (IDD).
Our work is shaped around the individual — their communication style, how they connect, and the support or accommodations that make dating more accessible and comfortable.
This work helped inspire Harrington Matchmaking and remains especially close to founder Kate Inez Harrington. It shaped our broader philosophy: understand and embrace the person first, then build the process around them.
Kate Inez Harrington
Owner, Harrington Matchmaking
“The neatest description of what I do — matchmaking — leaves out most of what makes this work extraordinary. I’ve waited on benches outside first dates because knowing I was nearby made a client more comfortable, cheered over first kisses and a ‘yes’ to a second date, and stayed on the phone through heartbreak. Sometimes I see someone through a first relationship, support them when it ends years later, and eventually match them again.
What stays with me most is the courage. I get to watch people who once wondered whether love would be part of their lives build relationships on their own terms — sometimes with more support, different expressions of intimacy, or lives that look nothing like what they’ve seen modeled elsewhere. What matters is that the relationship belongs to the people in it. Being trusted with these stories is an extraordinary privilege. This is my dream job.”
How we work
Matchmaking support, reimagined
More than a diagnosis
Labels are a starting point, not a matchmaking strategy.
We look beyond the label to the person — temperament, communication style, sensory and support needs, independence, desires around intimacy, and how they experience connection. We aren’t matching diagnoses. We’re matching people.
Coaching
Specialized support requires specialized learning.
Our coaches combine training in supporting neurodivergent and disabled clients with years of hands-on experience. Sessions can cover conversation, flirting, boundaries, physical affection, uncertainty, and preparing for dates — without teaching that there is one “right” way to date.
Safety and autonomy
Support without taking over.
When families worry about romance scams, manipulation, or misrepresentation online, we can build in additional screening and safeguards. Safety should never come at the expense of adulthood — we honor each client’s independence, privacy, and choices.
Collaborative approach
The right support system can be an asset to dating.
With the client’s involvement, we can work with parents, family members, therapists, aides, and others who support them — while keeping the person dating at the center of their own choices.
Sometimes we aren’t only matching two people, but two support systems. They’re the ones who will help uplift and sustain the relationship long after our work is done.
Specialized network
A network that can’t be created overnight.
Years of matchmaking, coaching, referrals, and community relationships have built an extensive network of neurodivergent and disabled singles across the U.S. and beyond — giving us room to look beyond a shared diagnosis for the person who may actually be right for you.
Also from our team
Constellations
Sometimes one-on-one support is out of budget, or what you’re really looking for is community.
Constellations combines membership community, group guidance, resources, gatherings, and the possibility of introductions.
Visit joinconstellations.com ↗
“I’m so glad my son has you, Kate. It’s so much more than matchmaking! You have a knack for communicating with him that is nonjudgmental. And he feels safe to express himself with you. That’s a real gift!”
Jenny in Maryland
“We highly recommend Harrington Matchmaking. Our son began working with them at 38. He struggled to maintain a relationship with even one friend. After a disastrous dating app experience we were recommended Kate by our neighbor. Our son is a different person now. He is in his 2nd long relationship with a woman in Virginia.”
Caldwell Family in Washington, D.C.
Where to start
Ways to work with us
Every option is shaped around the person dating, whatever their support needs.
Questions
Common questions
Do you work with autistic adults?
Yes. We have extensive experience matching and coaching neurodivergent adults, specifically autistic adults and adults with intellectual and developmental disabilities (IDD). Our work is shaped around the individual: their communication style, how they connect, and the support or accommodations that make dating more accessible and comfortable.
Do you work with adults with intellectual and developmental disabilities?
Yes. Adults with IDD are a central part of our work, in matchmaking, coaching, and our network of singles. We look beyond the label to the person, including support needs, independence, and how they experience connection.
Can a parent, family member, or support person be involved?
Yes. With the client’s involvement, we can work with parents, family members, therapists, aides, and others who support them, while keeping the person dating at the center of their own choices. Sometimes we’re matching two support systems as well as two people, because those families and networks are who will help the relationship thrive after our work is done.
Is Harrington Matchmaking only for neurodivergent or disabled adults?
No. We often work with adults who haven’t found their footing in traditional dating environments. That includes clients who are neurodivergent, navigating dating with disabilities, or who simply benefit from more guidance and support along the way.
Our founder, Kate Inez Harrington, now works exclusively with neurodivergent adults with low to moderate support needs. It’s the work closest to her heart.
Do you work outside the Washington, D.C. area?
Yes. We’re based in the D.C. metro area, but our Singles Database and Meetup community reach well beyond it, so we can make thoughtful matches for clients in many states. Coaching is virtual.
How do you find matches for neurodivergent and disabled adults?
Through our Singles Database, which has grown well beyond what we expected. Neurodivergent adults, disabled adults, and people who simply feel like outsiders in traditional dating environments joined in numbers that surprised even us. Our Meetup community keeps widening that network, giving us room to look beyond a shared diagnosis for the person who may actually be right for you.
How do I get started?
Book a consultation. We’ll learn more about you, what you’re looking for, and whether Harrington Matchmaking is the right fit. If it isn’t, we may recommend another program, professional, or resource better suited to you.
Currently, we have a waitlist
$350/consultation